CHOCOLATE MILK

If you'll take a few minutes to watch this illustration to the end, you might gain insight to a difficult subject to balance.  It's not original with me but sure did impact my life and understanding.


You'll notice in today's blog I tell a true story about one of our children "who shall remain nameless."  But then I slipped up and said the name.  With GRACE and forgiveness that offspring gave me permission to tell you the TRUTH!  Listen for the name. . .

Special thanks to my editorial assistant, Marilyn Pritchard, for her  illustrations below.  She's special order, as are her designs!

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FLIP SIDE

Know what I love in the middle of the night? The cool side of the pillow!

Last week's blog sparked hearts. More wrote than ever before. I posted a few comments but also received long letters, unpublished. It exposed much about our journey as we live out what it means to be a Christian today.

When I decided to blog, I also determined not to preach. And I won't. I COULD but I won't. Sharing my life with you, as I discover it myself, may sound like a soapbox at times. It's not. However, last week revealed my own heart on the subject of GRACE.

Grace, grace marvelous grace

Coming down from the Father above,

Sweep over my spirit forever I pray

In fathomless billows of love.

* * *

'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear

And grace my fears relieved,

How precious did that grace appear

The hour I first believed.

Familiar strains from two old hymns remind us of God's GRACE. Warm and comforting.

But to bring balance, I need to share the flipside of my pillow, the less popular: TRUTH.

Most people speak of one or the other and extremes rapidly and rabidly tend to occur. Jump on my see-saw for a moment and together let's see if we can totter between extremes, like Old Testament Law and New Testament Grace.

Tilting too far into grace keels us into liberalism, self-indulgence, even back to enslavement by a worldly harness of sin. Throwing the balance too far the other way distorts truth into legalism, pharisaism, judgmentalism and living a list of rules. That checklist Christianity kills the soul. Both are extremes, not God's plan. Coming out of one extreme often sends one reeling into the opposite extreme. Then extremists draw caricatures of each other.

Like most disciples of Christ, I struggle between "You may" and "You ought."

See-saw, Marjorie Daw, Jack shall have a new master.

He can't make but a penny a day because he can't work any faster.

I mindlessly read that nursery rhyme to Kimberly, Kent and Katy when they were little. Today it seems to speak to me in a new way. Next week's blog will be centered on the fulcrum of the the teeter-totter in a vivid illustration.

But for today, let's delve into sin. Theologically speaking of course. Not experientially, though we may all be experts there!

The philosophy that all truth is relative, there are no absolutes, no black and white issues but all gray areas, left to individuals. . .is not new. Humanism is also a religion and the antithesis of Christianity. Man is at the center of the first, God at the center of the second. There are biblical truths that stand eternally and cannot be erased by man's philosophy. Sadly much of American Christendom has tried to play-nice with political correctness. This can blur our distinctions, even erase truth.

"There is no other name under heaven

given among men whereby we must be saved."

Jesus

Narrow? Quite! My idea? Nope! Truth? Absolute Truth!

I recently read this on the subject:

Do You Hate Sin?

14 Oct 2010

Glynnis Whitwer

"For in his own eyes he flatters himself too much to detect or hate his sin." Psalm 36:2 (NIV)

Recently, a publicity firm invited a group of editors of Christian publications to preview a Hollywood film. The film producers were looking to get the message of this film into churches and wanted feedback from people like me in

Christian publishing.

The movie was dark, with a theme of unresolved guilt. Sadly, that guilt consumed the main character all his life, until he became a bitter old man. After we viewed the movie, the publicists turned on the lights and led a discussion. Basically, they wanted to know if we would recommend the movie to pastors. I stayed out of the conversation, because I'm a Pollyanna when it comes to movies. I like them happy and with a predictable ending. I know that's not very high-brow, but it's the truth.
However, the ensuing conversation intrigued me. Some people thought the movie was rich with important themes. They believed it would provoke thoughtful discussion. Others couldn't get past the language, and would never recommend it. One woman shared her opinion on the language with eloquence and passion.
She would never recommend it, she said, because of several instances of taking the Lord's name in vain. She defended her position by saying that too many people minimize sin. In fact, she explained, the film violated one of the Ten Commandments, to not misuse the Lord's name (Exodus 20:7).

The conversation continued with the challenge of relating to people without violating any of our beliefs. Our time together ended, and a few people got up to leave, including the woman who spoke against the movie. After she left however, another conversation began when a college-aged woman spoke up.
"My friends and I would never be bothered by the misuse of God's name," she said. "But we should." We sat in silence digesting her words.
That comment plays and replays in my mind. The honesty of that young woman touched me, as she identified a serious problem among those of us who call ourselves followers of Jesus: we tolerate sin. In fact, at times we even re-label it as "normal." I know there's a fine line between being in the culture but not of the culture. But that's not the root of this issue.

That young woman identified the real source: our hearts. We are going to be around sin until we get to heaven. Sin is woven in our human fiber. That's not the issue. The issue is what I think about it. Do I hate anything that sets itself up against God or His character? Do I hate sin?

Living as Christ's disciples, reflecting Him, is a life of love and service to God and others. But loving as God also means hating what He hates, namely sin. Too often we slip down that muddy, sin-slope and express hatred for the SINNER, rather than the sin. The world then PERCEIVES Christians only as proud, harsh bigots, rather than reflectors of God's love, a love that draws men out of sin to Himself.

Truth means we must stand not only FOR some things but AGAINST some. The essentials of the gospel are clear and few. Our impact on society, from neighborhood to globe, is magnified here, not just in the voting booth.

Adultery is still wrong. When did the 10 commandments become the 10 Suggestions? Stealing is not right, whether from the IRS or someone's wallet. OMG is common vernacular. Has it anesthetized us to truth and self-examination because "everybody's doing it" or "I don't mean anything by it?" Living right does not always mean silence.

"Preach the gospel at all times and when necessary use words."

St. Francis of Assisi

It means both. Walk the walk but talk the talk. Speak up against wrong. Truth is not the opposite of grace because it takes grace to walk in truth! Flipside of the same.

It takes effort, action to get our faith from our heads down into our hearts. But that effort is not about doing a list of do's and avoiding a list of don'ts.

David said, "I keep the Lord always before me; because he is at my right hand, I shall not be moved." Psalm 16:8

Always before me. Here's my plan of action! My efforts go toward my relationship with Him, nurtured daily. Then as God transforms me into His image, the Spirit empowers me to love, forgive, stand against sin personally and in society. I can't do those things alone nor correctly. Focus on outward activity rather than inward transformation robs me of abundant living.

So I do what I can do (spiritual disciplines to know Christ) in order to do what I can not do (love, forgive, be kind, gentle, patient, rid my life of sin.)

My very body, His temple, or my tongue can get in the way when I try to go it alone or by habit. But time with God (often, alone, long) ignites my spiritual gifts to help me perform His will. The fruit of the Spirit then begins to work out in me, a sign of His character. Both are the result, not the reality, of the Spirit in us.

He is the Vine. The Divine Vine. My job is just to stay attached, let His life flow through me. Simple? Yes, in principle. Hard? Yes, practically so, it's very hard. I keep clogging up the graft between branch (me) and vine (Him) with little ME-clogs! Takes daily time to let Him unclog the flow!

Only then can I see sin and truth as God does. It begins in my own self-examined life. When I hear someone expound often and loudly on sin, I watch the finger they use. If it constantly points to others but never notices the other fingers pointing back to self, I wonder about the hollowness of a graceless heart.

Dr. Phil McGraw's dad used to say something wise on the subject, "There's

something about you I don't like in me."

We do tend to criticize our own weaknesses in others, sometimes to avoid dealing with self!

Take a stand on sin. Begin with self. Live purely. Speak up when necessary but only as the Spirit flows lovingly through you.

"SPEAK the TRUTH in love."

Truthfully from my heart to yours,

Kathy

BLUE JEANS AND BEER CANS

Doug has a gorgeous, custom-built cabinet in his wood shop. It was designed and constructed for a KITCHEN.

How did this beauty end

up in his dusty shop? Someone measured wrong and Doug snagged a bargain!

Mismeasuring can be costly. But in Christianity, measuring can be deadly. We

tend to do so within the family, judging people by standards.

In the 60's it was sideburns. . .not too long but couldn't be non-existent either. Then hemlines followed, modesty varying by church or school rules.

When I was pre-adolescent a young pastor's wife had me on my knees convincing me that pants were a sin. So I went next door to Granddaddy Strickland's house and told Mama, "I gotta get rid of my blue jeans."

She promptly stomped back to the preacher's trailer and told that young wife, "My daughter's standards are between us and God!"

I didn't realize it so much then, but Mom set a great model for me. She recognized the little Pharisee in all of us. Why else did Jesus say so much about the religious groups doing this to each other? We merely substituted hemlines and sideburns for philacteries. Forcing the appearance of maturity or modesty on newborns actually thwarts spiritual growth.

Listening to man, even good men, can deafen ears to God's voice.

Martin Luther knew this and broke out in the PROTESTant REFORMation! We'd agree salvation is not by works, but neither is growth. Works, service, standards are results of maturity, not the means. Following God is not synonymous with following a list of rules. Transformation is a process only God does as we practice spiritual disciplines. Spiritual formation is the result.

"Grace is not opposed to effort, it is opposed to earning. . .

It isn't just action. That is the error of the Pharisee."

Dallas Willard

Daddy knew this too. While the Baptist standard in my teen years was no dancing, at home it was a non-issue. But there came a day I asked, "Daddy, there's a dance at school and I wanna go." I'd never been. That was precisely why I wanted to go.

"Well, Kathy, you're old enough to decide for yourself." He gave no warnings other than doing right. So I went. He knew I had no date so that made it safer. The music was loud and the dancing swirled around me, intoxicatingly. I sat there for awhile wishing I could do the twist. Then some guy asked me to dance. At that moment I realized I don't know HOW to dance! Juvenile brains don't project ahead very far.

"No thank you."

It was the most boring evening of my tender life! But Daddy gave me freedom to choose. He respected my will and expressed trust in me. Wow! What a gift.

Facial hair, alcohol, music, dress styles, the list is endless and evolving. So if beards are out, does that include soul patches for musicians? I know Fumanchus are out, fashionably speaking. Except I think the facial hair rule doesn't apply to vacation weeks.

One year Doug grew a beard during our mountain vacation. Then we bumped into our pastor in Cherokee, who also had grown a beard and was wearing a T shirt that said, "When all else fails, lower your standards." Gets confusing, doesn't it?

Now my first experience with alcohol was accidental. I may have been 12. I was my cousin's bridesmaid. During the rehearsal dinner for Joan Kay someone asked me if I wanted some punch. "Sure." I love punch.

But it tasted funny. I'd never heard of champaign punch. My virgin lips lost their virginity and I didn't even know!

My second experience with alcohol happened in church. The naval base in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, had communion. When I tasted the dipped wafer, I recognized it. . .champaign punch! There I go again--pure lips defiled!

More recently I played with a jazz band in Columbia for our state senators. We opened for SC's Josh Turner and That Long Black Train was rumbling my way! As we were leaving the gig. . . (yes, they actually say gig) I helped haul musical instruments, stands and equipment to our van. The dark parking lot was buzzing as caterers also lugged stuff to their van. Suddenly a chef dropped something and his armload began to roll toward the dark street. I rushed to help him gather up his cans. My arms full, I went to his van and suddenly realized I was loaded down with beer cans! The trumpet player, another Baptist, spotted me and grinned with, "I wish I had a camera. I'd love to see this in your Greenwood newsletter!"

Many adults still don't trust God enough to let Him mature their forever family. People break fellowship with a brother or sister over such disagreements. If you don't wear this, look like that, believe exactly as we say. . .you don't love God. Goodbye! Oh maybe not spoken in words, but worse. . .lived in lives of judgmentalness, separating from those God calls His.

Crawling off the throne to let God be God in others' lives broke a bondage in me. I'm not saying that standards or modesty are not important. I am saying God is the one to judge, guide and mature others as they grow in Him. He's able. Then convictions are real not imposed by people in order to measure up!

Blessings!

Kathy

ARTWORK ADDENDUM

SUNDAY 10-10-10

Marilyn took me up on the challenge--not to share a cup of java but to color my world. So I add for you, dear reader, her artwork custom made especially for me and this blog. My friend and editorial assistant expands her own world into design!

RANDOMNESS

This is the beginning of the blog.

I call it randomness because it is. I have no idea or thought about what's coming out of my fingers next. I've also had no coffee. I woke up thinking I need to write a post but had no ideas.

Today I also have no repairmen here. You think it strange to say that but it's the first time in about one and half weeks my garage has not had several. So along with no coffee, no ideas and no servicemen, I also have no termites. Well technically I do. But today they're all dead. Supposedly. You gotta trust Terminex, like you gotta trust your mechanic. Even if you don't fully trust. "Lord, I believe. Help thou my unbelief."

Last evening I interviewed a parent who came to sign up his 7-year old daughter for piano. I'm full but Phyllis had one opening. Somewhere in the middle of it, after a long day teaching, I told him, "I love little children. Monday and Tuesday. But if I saw another one on Wednesday I might hurt little children. That's why I hired Mrs. Parker." Did I say that out loud?

He laughed. Whew.

He's Taiwanese and sometimes my humor goes completely awry between me and Asians. It's not always the language barrier. He's a medical doctor and very adept at English. But the cultural differences don't always appreciate my style. It just slipped out. Oh, I've said it before. Just not usually to parents considering bringing their children to my house weekly. But he laughed.

"Mrs. Parker can love children here on Fridays and she'll love yours." Now that I think about it Phyllis can only love them one day and Trudy half that! Maybe I'm not so bad after all. It is an age thing though. I used to love kids three days a week but you learn your limits.

Last night after that interview I heard myself misspeak and ask Doug, "Honey, would you please bring me a bowl for speed sitting?" He knew exactly what I'd meant to say. He gets me, spoonerisms and all. I was eating grapes so you figure it out.

This is the middle of the blog.

Coffee's coming along. So is this. Aptly named Randomness.

Someone said, "Efficiency would be pouring your coffee directly into the toilet." But I love me some caffeine. And direct infusion just wouldn't taste the same.

When I woke up with no idea what to write, several old lines popped into my head:

A job begun is a job half done.

*

The hardest step of any journey is the first.

*

(song:)

Little by little, inch by inch,

By the yard it's hard. By the inch, what a cinch!

Never stare at the stairs, just step up the steps.

Little by little, inch by inch.

Well, that took up six lines. And YOU'RE still here. You need a life!

So do I. I also need my coffee in order to be coherent! I drink nearly a pot a day. Did so even before they exclaimed it to be medically good for you. Helps prevent something--maybe cancer and Alzheimer's. I forget.

Oh, remember I said repairMEN? Plural? I just remembered. Now we have a garage door that opens again. Lately it started acting like a teenager. You'd press the remote, telling it to, "Go." It might. Or might not. Often it just sat there or gaped there, doing nothing. Other times it would start to do its job but quit halfway through. I'd be backed almost to the street and it'd be halfway to the ground. We'd have to start all over. Like a teenager.

It was "a broken spring, ma'am." A big one. So they replaced both springs. Even though only one was broken. "That's the way we do the job," the boss told Doug. "Because the other one is gonna break too." Who knew garage door repairmen were also your psychic friends? But you gotta trust them too. Free enterprise and the American way I think.

Do all women take off everything when they step on the home scales to weigh? I'm just asking, not confessing. OK. Well it is a confession. Sometimes I even take off my earrings! And I've been known to exhale BIGTIME just before stepping on them. I got some scales from a doctor's office when they went digital. Mine are the kind with weights you ever so gently tap into accuracy. I wanted accuracy. So I thought. Not sure I trust them either. But you can adjust them I understand. Never done that yet but it's nice to know there is a way to weigh and cheat, after the chocolate indulgence. An option.

Do all women automatically throw both those little scale weights to the left before descending? Even Doug doesn't know my true weight. And he won't! He'd announce it to the whole church. Being an expert on the obvious, I learned. http://kathyhenderson.blogspot.com/2009/07/i-dont-think-youre-ugly-old-age-isnt.html

"Thoughts disentangle themselves

as they pass through the lips

or the fingertips."

These may not. But I told you so in the title. If you know me, you also know I'm not a morning person. It's morning. My caffeine is just kicking in but I'm throwing in the towel. (See? Normally I'd never use two clichés in one sentence.)

Ah! Ready for my second coff of cuppie. This blog wasn't so hard after all. For me. Maybe it was harder for you. I'm not even putting pictures in this one. Use your imagination to color my world. I suggest fushia and lime green.

Marilyn Pritchard, my friendly editorial assistant, has her work cut out for her on this one! However, I think editing may cancel out randomness. So just join me for some coffee, Marilyn. You're really slumming to come from Contact magazine down to me anyway. Am I your charity case? You'll get a reward in heaven for this.

This is the end of the blog.

Thankfully, as are you,

Kathy